“We may be closest to hearing the call when we feel most alone or in trouble, for genius hides behind the wound and one of the greatest wounds in life is to not know who we are intended to be or what we are supposed to serve in life.”― Michael Meade, The Genius Myth
I was trying to examine my wound. Although I felt it, I couldn’t recall it.
Then I remembered that my mother had told me that when I was about six months old, a doctor told her that by the dull look in my eyes that I was retarded and wouldn’t develop any real intelligence.
I didn’t see how this affected my life then and now. I knew I wasn’t retarded.
But I did feel something.
I was in my teens when mom told me this. I had felt defective for as long as I could remember. This new information confirmed it.
What I didn’t know was that when the doctor told mom I was defective, it had a devastating impact on her.
The judgement that I was defective was traumatized mom. Her Trauma was transmitted to me. Its affect on me was not addressed because no one knew I was affected. This trauma wrote a message on my consciousness that was nearly indelible.
That’s how I came to see myself as defective. It was the source of my shame and anger. I didn’t realize it after I was told.
So, that’s the wound, but to what am I called?
I’m called to serve spirit. it’s not the solution, just a commitment to living authentically. To commit to a spiritual quest to serve myself and others.
I have been guided on my own healing journey and now I can help guide others. I have been given the gift of being able to facilitate a person’s journey inward for growth and healing. I do this in the company of other good people, committed to their own healing and to helping others..
More to come